The Art of Taking

by Rhonda Kuykendall-Jabari

As children, we are taught that it is better to give than to receive. This is a good lesson for children, who tend to be takers by necessity and by nature. It begins in the womb. If a pregnant mother is undernourished, the fetus will rob her of available nutrients in order to survive. This is why mothers with low iron or other deficiencies can give birth to a healthy baby. It’s nature’s way of providing for those who cannot provide for themselves.

As we mature, we learn that giving is essential. We give to our jobs in exchange for the money we need to live. We give to the schools our children attend in hopes of securing a brighter future for them. If we're lucky, we give to our parents who so we may return the love and care they gave to us. Responsible, compassionate adults become such expert givers that it is as natural as breathing. But as years pass, adults give less and less to other adults. This leaves a gap in the lives of people who tend to over-give and under-take. So, like the fetus in the womb, we must return to the fine art of taking what we need to survive. It is assumed and expected that we know what we need and how to get it.

The art of taking is not a selfish act. Taking what we need to thrive helps us to be better givers. It also relieves others of the burden of giving us what we should be able to get for ourselves.

1. Take time to commune with your higher consciousness. It is a basic human need to be alone with our own thoughts and feelings. Technology has created an expectation of instant and constant availability that can prevent us from meeting this basic need. It began with pagers and has expanded to email, cell phones, social networks and handheld computers. We tweet, post, link and share 24/7. Take time to set healthy boundaries. My cell phone is usually off when I’m home and I may not even hear it ringing when it is on. I’m not so important that life as we know it will end if I’m out of reach; and neither are you. Take time to care for your physical body and your spirit. Realign yourself with what you’ve said you want to get out of life. Do it privately and quietly that you may receive and respond to divine guidance. Time is moving on and will end as scheduled for each of us. Don’t let time run out before you’ve finished the life God wants for you.
2. Take control of your personal resources. A resource has three main characteristics: (1) utility or usefulness; (2) quantity or availability; and (3) use in producing other resources. Each person has specific skills and assets that are useful to the universe. Money, love, wisdom, knowledge and abilities (natural and acquired) are aspects of your resources. It is important to understand and embrace your usefulness to the world. Be aware that you are not a bottomless well, so don’t waste yourself by giving to entities and individuals that do not or cannot give back. This is the only way you can make your unique and sustainable contribution to the universal energy that is inherent in all living things. It is how we remain connected to past and future generations.
3. Take responsibility for your life. This is the key to authentic empowerment. Stop making excuses and giving your power away. Stop hiding behind your children’s needs or your parent’s character defects. You are responsible for living up to your greatest potential. Be responsible for making sure you’re ready for every wonderful opportunity this life may offer. Be responsible for your successes and for learning life’s lessons along the way. Be responsible for putting a period on past hurts. Make amends, accept others’ apologies, atone and be accountable to The Creator who blessed you with breath, bone, flesh and this awesome experience we call life.

When we master the art of taking responsibly, lovingly, compassionately, we move closer the universal life source that sustains all of mankind.  Taking, then, is transformed into selfless giving.